01 Aug Are you sitting comfortably?

If you are sitting comfortably then you are in your Comfort Zone and maybe you need to move!

I know I do.

I understand all about Comfort Zones. I know that when we do something often, we feel confident and comfortable doing it. I know that when we do something new that is a little challenging but not too bad, we go into our Stretch Zone. This is a good place. It feels a little uncomfortable to begin with but it is where we learn new things. Gradually as we become better at these things, we feel confident and comfortable and so our Comfort Zone widens a little to make room for the new knowledge or habit. This is how we improve our confidence – by stepping in to our Stretch Zone and doing something enough times that it becomes part of our Comfort Zone.

Does that make sense? It feels good when we do that because we feel like we’ve accomplished something. It’s a fist pump moment!

And then there’s the Panic Zone. This is beyond our Stretch Zone and is where we are doing something so far removed from our Comfort Zone, that we feel physically sick maybe, paralysed by the inability to act perhaps – terrified. If you asked me to Bungee jump that would be in my Panic Zone. If you asked my daughter to sing on a large stage on her own, that would be her Panic Zone.

We’re all different. Where one person’s Comfort Zone becomes their Stretch Zone may be a Panic Zone for someone else. And they move according to how we are feeling about ourselves too. For me in my worst days of depression, going out and speaking to other people was my Panic Zone. At other times in my life, I have stood on a stage and acted, loving every minute.

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new. – Brian Tracy

Ideally, when faced with a challenge that takes us in to our Panic Zone, we would lead up to it gradually. Take a small step that would take you into your Stretch Zone first. Get comfortable with that, build your confidence so that your Comfort Zone expands and then move nearer to the big challenge. The more, small Stretch steps you can take, the bigger your Comfort Zone becomes, the less of a Panic challenge you face. I’ve seen this in children in class so many times. Move them on too quickly with a concept and they hit the Panic Zone and either have a meltdown or give up. Take them through small steps first and their confidence increases so than can tackle the same challenge with relative ease.

If you’re facing a challenge now that is making you feel uncomfortable, keeping you awake at night or that you are procrastinating over, ask yourself which zone you think it falls into.

Chances are, it’s in your Panic Zone. Can you take small steps towards it that will build your confidence and reduce the Panic? Or can you identify what it is about it that is making you Panic? How can that be reduced? Sometimes the things we are putting off are not big deals to others and you could be beating yourself up about it because you know it isn’t a big deal to them – partners, colleagues, friends. Well that’s great. That’s their definition of their zones. You have your own. So ask yourself “why?” –  Why is this thing causing me such an issue? Why does it make me feel so uncomfortable?

It is through asking ourselves these questions that we can begin to unpick what steps we need to take to get the thing done. Or not. Maybe it doesn’t need doing and can be ditched. You will only know by taking it out, having a jolly good look at it and picking it apart. Do it without judging yourself. It’s ok to feel Panic- you’re a human being, not a robot! if you can identify the Stretch steps, and take them, then congratulations! You are learning and growing and are being very brave! Go you!

Need some more reassurance? Think of a time when you had to do something new. How did you feel about it? What did you do? What did you learn? How did you feel after you had done it? What can you do now as a direct result of having taken that step? See? You have evidence that says you can do this!

Sometimes you need a little help and support to go through this process. That’s where Coaching can help. It gives you time to think about these questions and someone that will ask them – and not let you off the hook until you’ve answered them!

Now that I’ve told you all that I know, I need to go coach myself through my Panic Step – marketing! So beyond anything I have ever known! And so, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and take a long hard look at it and make a start on my Stretch steps, one step at a time.